Q. I am 45 and my husband is 45. We have three children. Even now my husband wants sex everyday. Sometimes 2-3 times a day. I get mood 1-2 times a month. His behavior is responsible for me loathing sex.. He is not unconcerned whether I am active or inactive. He wants me in bed whenever he needs. His forcing made me averse to sex. Since I am his wife I am satisfying his desire. However this is not enough for him. He says I should show interest in sex and be active. He always insults me saying I am useless and a prostitute is better than me. Even then I satisfied him giving my body. I am unable to understand how should I bear him. I can show interest at least once in 2-3 days if I am not tired but he will not observe it. He questions me why I am showing disinterest when he is giving sexual enjoyment. Advice me on this.
Ans: Your husband is thinking only about sexual enjoyment but he is not understanding why you are not participating actively. He is under the impression that since he likes sex, you also feel the same. He is not realising that sex pleasure depends on physical and psychological conditions. One should try to understand the behavior of the partner and why they are not showing interest. One will not get sexual enjoyment by force. One should analyse themselves showing empathy towards partner. Both consult doctor and get counseling. It will help who should change and helps in better understanding.